I met a remarkable man last Saturday. A friend of mine was having a vendor party at her house, and he was one of the vendors and I bought some things from him. Got to talking to him. Him and his wife have been married a couple years longer than we have, and him and his wife are in the process of adopting through our state’s foster care system. They become licensed foster parents, but on the list as ones who want to adopt. He went through the process they are going through in great detail. I won’t bore you with the details, but it definitely is much more gruelling than what we are doing in some ways, and in other ways, I think we are getting much more guidance - at least with the transracial stuff (it’s against the law for the state to do any direct transracial counseling in a domestic adoption). Also, they are expected to foster a couple of kids temporarily before placed with a kid who is ready to be adopted, and even then, its when the biological parents are at least 6 months from having their parental rights terminated. So, there is still a chance that the parents could get their kids back.
I told him straight up that him and his wife are heroes in my book, to be willing to do that with that kind of risk. I told him we couldn’t handle having a kid in our home only to have to give them up, and especially if we are told we could adopt and there still be a chance that it won’t happen. We are definitely doing it the “easy” way. He was extremely gracious and told me he belives that no matter how we get the children or where they come from, that God leads each of us differently in that journey.
Him and his wife also have an 8 year old son, and they are asking for a child from toddler to teenager. Wow. They are still doing their classes, and haven’t had all their home visits done yet (right there, we had only 1 home visit, and they have to have 4), but expect to be on the waiting list later this year.
I’m sorry I don’t have all their names. If you think about it, please say a prayer for them - God knows who they are, both for strength and resolve, and thanks that at least one foster child in this state is going to go to a loving family.